In other, less pryotechnic news, welcome to TheGrape's (That's me) Big Long Hateful Hate List of Hated Hates, So Foul and Hated (TGBLHHLHHSFH for uh, short). If you're wondering why I made this hate list, it's because, believe it or not, I hate lots of things. And instead of constantly bitching about things to people, I decided it'd be better to just force it upon the world without too much effort; so I thought I'd skip the middle-man and set up shop (or whatever) here. Have a blast. And ignore my pathetic HTML skills.

    Warning: Since this is just a "fun thing" for me to do, it gets updated on-and-off. Don't expect me to update it every day--most of the stuff that I hate went up when the page did. Besides, I hate a lot of stuff, but I can't hate that much. And no sending your stuff in. That's a stupid idea.

Okay, the cake's afloat!

1. Paper-In-Plastic Bags
   I have a job at the Queen Anne Thriftway. It's quite keen: I put people's food in bags! Paper is fine; plastic is fine; but for the love of Christ people, paper IN plastic? Not only is it wastefull, it's also cumbersom and not as strong.
2. Talk Shows
   Now these are just stupid. All it ever is is either "People Bitching About Their Ex-Communist Husband Turned Wife Who Has A Window-Fetish" or Jay Leno promoting a new movie starring Wesley Snipes and Rutger Hauer. There are two expections to this catagory: Conan O'Brien, and topics such as "Is Your Overdeveloped Teen Obsessed With Sex?".
3. CD Cases
   I can't tell you how much I hate these. The CD that comes in them may be fine and dandy, but the cases are pieces of crap. For starters, they're a pain and a half to get opened the first time--getting the tape off and shit; they break all the time, and finally, they don't always keep the CD clean.
4. People Who Don't Get Jokes
   Oy. You know what I mean: You tell the funniest Irish Joke on the planet and the person just stares at you like you're a dumbass. And then he/she asks you to explain it, you tell him, and then the joke's just not funny anymore in the least.
5. The Word "Tit"
   Now don't get me wrong, I love boobs. But the word "tit" just sounds so small and... deflated? Boobs, jugs, knockers, hell even breasts gets the point across and sounds nicer. Oh, and it makes pornos sound stupid. "Tit Vixens from Venus"? What kind of name is that?
6. Pop-Up Internet Banners
   Everyone hates these, unless you're one of those freaks who runs 300,000 of them on your screen to make five cents an hour. I can't describe how useless they are: everyone just closes them the second they come up--unless you're one of those freaks who runs 300,000 of them on your screen to make five cents an hour.
7. Ants
   Ants are dumb. They're always crawling around the yard and getting in electrical sockets and stuff. But most of all, I hate the KING ants. You know the ones I'm talking about: big red ones that fly around on these wings longer than they are, looking for some place to start a colony. At least they're good for hitting with pencil sharpeners.
8. Disney Land Hats
   God, here's a doozey. The reason I hate these so is because of, well, there's a Donald Duck hat above my bed that I got at Disney Land. One time, my cat hit it with her tail and the thing fell on my face in the middle of the night, waking me up with quite a stirr. I threw it across the room, and hit my Playstation... which was still running halfway through a boss-battle in Final Fantasy 7. A very hard boss battle. And the hat hit the PSX and it fell off the table, unplugging itself in the process.
9. Automatic Shotguns
   Recently, I've started to become a gun-nut. I love guns. Most of all, I love shotguns. Pump-Action shotguns are GREAT because of the lovely "Cher-CHUNK" noise they make when you cock them; it's also just a plain fun thing to do. But automatic-loading shotguns, one's that use gases and the kickback of the gun to cock/load itself, are no fun. I don't like those.
10. "Do you need a huuuuuuug?"
    You know what I mean. The Big Jolly[tm] people who go around asking you if you want a hug. Normally, Big Jolly[tm] people are cool. But... not when they hug. Big Jolly[tm] people shouldn't hug.
11. The Word "Rather"
    I just don't like this word. Most of the time, it's used to make somthing sound "not as much as most do", as in "It was a rather blue house". What the hell's that supposed to mean? If it was "rather blue", then it would need to have ANOTHER color to it. So is it blue and purple? Blue and orange? The word sucks.
12. Repaints of Transformers
    It's no lie: I love Transformers. I have tons of them. But if there's one thing that irks me about them, it's the damned repaints (changing the colors on a previously released toy and selling it again). I'm no completist, but a lot of the time the repaint looks way cooler than the one *I* have, so basically I'm boned.
13. Canned Cat Food
    Now I'm all for cats, but for chrissakes, why is the CANNED stuff so damned nasty? I don't have long nails so it's hard to pull the covers off with that little dohicky; when I finally DO get it opened I usually use enough force that some of the "goop" flies out and hits my shirt or somthing; and then the stuff that the cat doesn't eat gets all hard and crusty in a day or two, and then it smells like shit.
14. PVC
    PVC, otherwise known as PolyVinyl Chloride, is somthing quite a few toys are made out of today. It's sufficiantly heavy in your hand, but it's bendy as all get-out. I look over at my MSiA Gundam [G], made out of the stuff, and I keep thinking it's going to melt if I keep it so close to my lamp.
15. Mechanical Pencils
    In short, every single mechanical pencil I've ever owned has jammed on me, and I God knows I'm not the one to go messing around inside a pencil. I never use 'em.
16. Netscape Navigator
    This program friggin' sucks!! (Update: I've since moved to IE! Go Microsoft! *Shoots self*)
17. In-Jokes That I Don't Get
    When people have an in-joke, that's all good. But when people won't EXPLAIN the joke to you and leave you high-and-dry, well then they're just assholes. I never explain in-jokes to my friends.
18. Internet Idiots
    As someone constantly on IRC (Internet Relay Chat), I've become a very good typist. You see, when someone types as follows: "damnit i fuckin ghate my life" they're generally considered idiots. I don't like idiots, no.
19. eBay Auction Titles
    You know what I'm talking about. "L@@K! Mint C-10 Ming Vass, vintag 1823!!1". 'Nuff said.
20. Assignments In Fun Classes
    Like when you've got a really fun class, and you're given so much in-class assignments that you can't do what's fun. Like figuring out the rest of the Jurassic Park theme in MIDI Lab. Feh.
21. People Who Think The Happenings of September 11th, 2001 Are Funny
    God, I can't discribe how STUPID these people are. It's not funny; thousands of people died. As far as I'm concerned, people like this can die too.
22. Overused Jokes
    Nygh. It's too damned annoying when the same two people keep using the same four jokes over and over and over and over until your head explodes and sprays ooey-gooey brain bits all over the school and the chick in the chair next to you that you have a secret crush on.
23. Bad Rap Music
    Yo I don't care what'cher thinkin', but this kind of music is stinkin', and it only sounds good when I'm drinkin'! Not to hard for all these words to get linkin', lest of course I was Abraham Lincoln, but after all that booze I gotta go tinklin'!
24. "Or Whatever His Name Is"
    I hate it when people say this right after they say a name that's correct. Because usually it's a half-assed attempted to make the person sound like they don't care or don't know anything about what they're talking about, when they really do.
25. Websites That Close
    So I go to a website I really like, and what do I get? "We've decided that, (insert stupid reason), we will no longer be able to run (site name). There's usually no good reason, and most of the time they take down all the good content on the site. I'd be perfectly happy if they just didn't update. Blagh.
26. Wet Dogs
    There's really not much I can say about this. My dog is the type that likes to jump up on you when you come home from work or school or a strip club. I don't mind that, it's when she's soaking WET that makes me hate it.
27. People who don't like Invader ZIM
    Fools! Foolish, doomed fools!! Bow before the superior humor and funny...stuff... of ZIM!! There is no escape from Zim: Invader blood marches through his veins like giant radioactive pants! The pants command you... do not deny his veins!
28. People who speak l33t twenty-four seven
    My 9od 1 h@+3 Th1$ 50R+ OPH THIng. l33+ iS k3wL 4nd @Ll, 8U+ It Sh0uld 0nLY 8e U$ED PH0R J3s+ 4Nd phUNnY.
29. People That Say "Maybe" When Asked A Question
    Argh! I can't begin to discribe how aggrivating this can get. "Are you having a nice day?" "Maybe." "Sure is nice weather, eh?" "Maybe." "Are you an asshole?" "Maybe."
30. Bad J-Pop
    It's no secret, I'm a fan of a lot of japanese music, mostly from anime and Dance Dance Revolution stuff. Then, there's the BAD stuff that gives the good J-Pop a bad rap. Nope, don't listen to the stuff. Nope nope nope.
31. The Day Before School Starts
    If you've ever been in school, I'm pretty sure you know what I'm talking about. The day before school starts back up, be it summer vacation or spring break, feels like your last meal before getting the chair.
32. Assy MP3 Sharing Programs
    Boy, the whole thing went down the shitter after Napster, eh? Now a days you can't find a single good mp3 sharing program unless you're like, supercomputerman, which I'm not. With my awful luck, i'm lucky (bleh) to find a single mp3 that finishes transfering now...
33. Stupid Models
    I collect and built a lot of models like WWII stuff, Zoids, Gundam, ect... But nothing tickles my wheat more than when you get a model that looks friggin badass on the cover of the box, then when you put it together it looks worse than the J-35 Draken.
34. Socks
    Now I understand the necessity of socks, and "sock" is a funny word, and there was my long-forgotten Sock o' Pennies (long story, later), but who the hell came up with socks? I wanna meet the man who said "hey, let' put things on our feet between our shoes and feet!" and punch him in the kisser. Really.
35. People Who Think They Can Do CGI But Can't
    I took a year and a half of Computer Aided Drawing (CAD) classes, and doggone it half the class was all like "Ooh d00d i know CAD!" and I was like "That's a fish" and they said "That's supposed to be a lamp, dude," and I say, "You're drunk" and they say "Want some?".
36. Seinfeld
    Man, I used to love Jerry S. so much. The guy was a genius, every word out of his large-lipped mouth was pure gold. But these days, he's (As far as I know) past his fame. At least he went out with grace then making walk-ons on Jerry Springer or Greg the Bunny.
37. Kelsey Grammer
    While we're on the subject of people, Kelsey Grammer... I don't like you. I don't like you at all. Bite me. The left one, and be careful becuase it's sensetive.
38. Aussies
    Aw who am I kidding, I love aussies. I love the country, I love the people, I love the accent, I love the crazy vocab, I love aussies!
39. Those People Who Won't Accept Others Opinions As Opinions And Assume Everything They Hear HAS To Be Cold Hard Fact Or Else You're An Idiot
    Because, frankly, close-minded people like this are what's wrong with the world. They're so obsessed with everything being the way THEY think it should be that they just piss everyone off and make people unhappy.
40. People Who Use Too Many Goddamned Emoticons
    Why-oh-why do some people feel the need to put a smiley after every period? It's like, "Yes, I KNOW you're happy. Shut the hell up about it and stop making stupidass smileys everywhere!"

If you like the hate, here's a site you'll hate (I made a funny!). The Magic Hate Ball!

If you want to email me to inform me of some horrible burning lust you have for me or some other raunchy information, go to your local school cafe, order the mystery meat (read: slop) and burn in hell.
After that, click THIS LINK, you scallywag.





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